hell on earth

before i get to the part where i discuss my experience with hell on earth, i will start with the good stuff. (btw sorry for not updating recently, laos had crappy internet and there was just a lot of to and fro'ing to be done which didn't leave much time. now i'm in chiang mai, thailand and all is good with the interwebs). picking up where i left off from my previous entry, the next morning in luang prabang sharon and i explored a pagoda in town at the top of this hill, with just lots of stairs. the pagoda slash hill is pho sy. it was pretty unspectacular except for the views of the surrounding area from up there. you could see the mekong river in all its brown glory and another nearby river i don't recall the name of, also in brown glory. but still, it was cool. there were some pretty flowers, funky twisted trees, and snails with shells along the way up. once back down, we just meandered into another temple with some pretty cool murals on the wall. some kid was dancing around us. i never know if these kids are just being cute or they're expecting money when they do it. i took a photo of these 3 cute kids playing on our bike ride in vang vieng, and after i showed them the photo, they put their hands out saying, "money??" they laughed and took them away though cause they were shy. anyway. we further meandered down to the river, which wasn't all that exciting right there. and the water is just really brown. not sure if it's only that color in rainy season or not. every few feet we were asked if we wanted a tuk tuk or a boat ride. we went through a local food market. the fruits looked pretty yummy, but the meats all were covered in flies. (see photo in album). nothing else too notable until we all boarded the trucks and took off to hike/swim at kuangsi waterfalls.

one special treat is on the way into the falls, there is a bear preserve for asiatic bears (aka small bears). they get to come there after being rescued from poachers or being hurt in the wild. they had a nice set up with hammocks and they were pretty lively. the falls were not disappointing. big, multiple levels, greenish blue water. the main falls are very high, so you can hike up to the semi-top. i opted to just swim. the water was refreshing (read: cold) and there were some annoying biting fish that were picking at my scabs on my knees that i inherited from mud volleyball a couple days before. i tried swimming under one of waterfalls, but it was just too powerful. i would swim with all my effort towards it, and it was like swimming in place. i made it near one of the smaller ones. and just enjoyed the water.

we had dinner as a group. several people got lao bbq, which involves some soup broth, lots of veggies and buffalo fat and other meats in a metal bundt cake-type pan over hot coals. i looked good, but i got a tofu stirfry dish that was yum. it was frank's bday, the brother of our tour leader owen. so we had a big ol' chocolate cake to celebrate. it was a nice relaxing evening which we rounded out by just sitting around on the porch chatting for a couple more hours.

the next morning was an early morning. i was planning to join some others and wake up at 5:30 am to go see some locals monks do their rounds to collect alms, or food/money. they line up and parade down the street and the devout locals, or tourists or whoever want to, can donate some rice or food or money into these pots they carry. but, unfortunately, when i woke up i was feeling a bit...off. i felt extremely cold, the kind of cold you feel when you have chills. uh-oh. so i slept in a little more, got my bag packed. and our group had to meet up early anyway to head out for a day long journey to chiang rai, thailand involving speed boats on the mekong river for some 6 odd hours...oh boy! i was feeling ok, minus the temperature thing. so i thought all would be ok. the speed boats involved covering our bags with plastic in case of rain. and packing a small pack to hold with us. then sitting 3 to a long wooden motorized speed boat, manned by one little lao man with no shoes. we were given life vests and helmets with visors, like motorcylce type. hardcore i know. there were some small cushions to sit on and lean on at least with your lower back.

the boats go really fast. i think they told me 80 kmh, which is abut 50 mph. so, yeah. fast. they have to dodge some rocks and stuff, kinda miami vice style. it was cool for approximately 1 hour. the mountains and cattle and water buffalo on the sides added to the interesting scenery. but then it kinda became a bit boring. until, i realized i had to pee. i hadn't felt very hungry for breakfast, cause my stomach was so so. so i had only had a big thing of orange juice. and i had to pee like no other time in my life. i was actually searching my bag for plastic bags or containers i could possibly pee into (sorry if this is graphic ha) and finally asked the boat driver to pull over. not and easy feat since there is like no where to really pull over to except sandy banks. which is what he did. i had to walk around the edge of this sandy bank to a point where no one would see me. i had sand up to my shins. but the excitement is just beginning.

our boat had some trouble starting again. took a few mins, but he got it up and running finally. we stopped for lunch at a random house like thing over the water. the bathrooms involved just basically going over a hole in the floor in a close off closet thing, and everything just went straight into the water. i still wasn't feeling hungry and all that great. i felt hot. it was hot outside, but i felt massively hot. and queasy. and achy. i got some panadol, aka tylenol from someone in the group which later helped this. luckily on the next leg of the boat ride (did i mention it was like 6 hours long, with stops every 1.5-2 hours or so?) i sort or slept so it went by quick. the next stop was a bathroom break. in another random floating house. i actually felt like i was going to puke at this point. but didn't. the guide gave me some tiger balm to rub on my stomach. at the following stop i thought i was feeling better. we had to sit in the boats and wait while they refueled, and i just got overheated and nauseas again and threw up a couple times. yay. at that point, we were very close to the end, but our boat broke down again. another boat had to come and attach itself to us to get us to plod along. the heat was melting us, especially since we were wearing long pants and shirts to protect from wind/sun burn. once up and running again, we made it to the end point. we had to get out, carry our bags up a hill and load onto a truck. someone carried my bag for me cause i was feeling weak. once at the top. i felt dizzy, and owen got me a sprite. but as he went to go get it, i threw up some more. so not fun. the journey was excruciating. and it wasn't even over. once on the trucks, we were dropped off at another pier where we had to go through lao immigration, load our bags onto another boat bleh and cross the river to thailand. there we had to drag our bags up a hill to thai immigration and then board another truck to take us on a 2 hour ride into the golden triangle. the only thing that saved me were some nice group members who got me drinks and carried my bags and the a/c int he truck on the way. i slept the whole way. once int he hotel, i just showered and slept. basically all night.

the next morning i was feeling better, but weak since i hadn't eaten. i ventured out and got some toast and crackers and chocolate milk. it took me 30 minutes to eat the toast. but i felt better afterwards. this day was mostly in the a/c. we were at the golden triangle, which is where laos, thailand and myanmar all meet up on the river. there's a lookout point where you can see all three. after that, we visited the opium museum about the history opium growing, the war and all that in the region. we broke up our some 4 ish hour car ride to chiang mai by stopping at this wacky place called the white temple. it is all white (!) and is buddhist, though it involves a lot of the artist's interpretation. there are skulls hanging from trees, and built into some of the columns. there is a sea of clay hands and arms coming up from the ground and tusks surrounding the entrance. it's supposed to be walking into the devil's lair i think...inside though, is a mural the artist has painted with lots of pop culture icons including neo from the matrix, kung fu panda, spiderman, the world trade center building being blown up, and if you look up over the door there is a face of some demon kind of thing. the door is the mouth. the eyes have hard to see hologram figures or g.w. bush in one eye and osama bin laden in the other eye. all i could think was, "ryan would love this place!" haha. it was strange, but also very cool. i think it would look especially cool at night or sunset.

i'll end this blog saying we made on final stop at a place where they make chestnuts. not so exciting. but we got to sample a bunch of flavors like coconut, spicy ones, and ginger and chocolate.